Honeymoon in the Bahamas! Kim mistook island fever for jungle fever and I almost lost her!!

So after our insanely awesome wedding we were wisked away to the beautiul island of the Bahamas! Good thing we had to catch the 8:00am flight the morning after our wedding... It was just the right time for Roger to not get over his hangover and to leave his wallet at home or the entirety of the trip. We had a fun filled first day that consisted of connecting flights and sitting next to utter renobs. On our connecting flight from Miami to Nassau was no other than Kim Kardashian. Kim Coleman just about had a panic attack and could not stop staring at her. Kim Kardashian however, could not stop looking at Roger so I guess it was even Steven. We spent the days on the beach drinking Margaritas, Pina Coladas, and any other girlie drink that we could possibly pour down our throats. The hotel was awesome, and the food and drinks even better. On our second day on the island we decided to take the number 10 bus downtown. This was no ordinary bus though! The subwoofers in the back just about made us deaf from the Bob Marley playing at the loudest setting, the native Bahamian woman with armpit hair that had a staring problem was even better. I couldn't tell if she wanted to make out with Kim or flat out stab me in the face. The number 10 bus also did not have the need to use the public roads. When we approached a traffic jam on a two lane highway it resulted in our driver taking a hard left into a grassy, mud filled field. The apparently was business as usual, but Kim and I thought we would end up falling into one one of the 2000 puddles that looked to be at least 30 feet deep. After the field romp, the driver stopped at the local gas station for a 10 minute break while we sat on the stinky, hotter than hell bus.  Downtown was a lot of fun, and somewhat irritating because every islander wanted to sell us a fake rolex watch or cuban cigars. After returning to our hotel we were able to watch the NBA finals on a HD projecter on the beach, have a few more drinks, and eventually go back to our room to clean sand out of every place imaginable on the human body. We had a fantastic time and loved every minute of the trip. I think the best part of the whole experience was watching every male on the island learing at Kim in her bikini. I don't know, it just made me feel good. I took every opportunity to grope her in public and then smile at whichever guy was eye f'n her.